TRUST

Do not worry do not fear

let your heart be still

for who on earth of mortal man

can always know God's will

But this we know - who worship Him

by faith shall live the just

For then we see the power of

the One in whom we trust

You will keep him in perfect peace

who's mind is stayed upon You, because he

trusts in You.  Trust in the Lord forever, for

the Lord God is an everlasting rock.

Isaiah  ch.26, vs.3 and 4

My near death experience

I was twenty eight years old at the time, I was in a dental surgery having two wisdom teeth taken out with the aid of gas.  As I sat in the chair with the mask on my face, the dentist commenced to take one of  the teeth out before I was fully anaesthetized.  The pain was unbelievable and the shock of experiencing it so great that I inhaled fully and found, to my horror, that I could not exhale again.  I remember feeling very frightened and helpless for quite some time, thinking that I was certainly going to die from lack of oxygen.  I was trying to do something about the situation but it was as if there was just enough anaesthetic to keep me half dazed yet I could feel all the pain.  As I struggled to breathe the dentist had his assistant to hold me down and started to extract the other tooth.  The feeling of total agony was indescribable.  Then suddenly all the fear was gone and I was in a most beautiful place where there was green grass and beautiful flowers, and little fawns and wild animals grazing everywhere.

 I was lying on my back in a place of tremendous beauty, a beauty of such that I have never seen in all my travels in this world.  It was as if I had just awoken from a deep sleep, my twenty eight years of life was as the dream and that was reality.   I remember several people were gathered around me.  I felt a great love for these people, a love that was deeper than any I had ever known, almost as if they were a part of myself.  They were not people that I had known or seen in my lifetime, I cannot even say whether they were male or female, it did not seem to matter.  Yet I felt like I had known them for an eternity.  At that moment I knew the mystery of life.  It was as if all the questions I had ever wanted answering about life's purpose were being answered in a split second of wonderfully perfect knowledge.  I felt as if that place was reality and my whole twenty eight years of lifetime was just as fleeting and unimportant as a dream.  I remember a feeling which can only be identified with how the prodigal son must have felt on returning home to his father.

 

This quickly changed to a feeling of tremendous sorrow and disappointment as one of these beautiful people said ' It's not time yet, you must go back.'  I seemed to know that what was being said was said with authority and that I would very soon be leaving them.  I knew also that there was no personal decision made by these people as to whether I was to stay or not, only that this was how it had to be.  I remember saying with great sadness in my heart ' I don't want to go back.,' only to be told ' You must go back'  Then I felt as if I was spinning around in a tunnel and being drawn backwards at tremendous speed.  The speed was so great that although I knew I was spinning, I appeared to remain in an upright position, almost like the propeller of an aircraft appears to remain still,  when rotating at high speed. The next thing I knew, I was in the dentist's chair and I started to cry.  I wanted to tell them that I was in the wrong place, but I did not know how to explain.  I tried to remember what it was that I had known and understood in my moment of revelation in that beautiful place, but the knowledge had been taken away from me as suddenly as it had been given to me.

 

I will never forget the torment of the next three days or so, my poor husband thought I was going to have a breakdown.  For nearly a week after my experience, each morning my husband would say to me 'You was speaking in a foreign language in your sleep last night'.  I said to him the first morning 'What do you mean a foreign language,  was I muttering?'  'No' he said 'you was speaking in a foreign language'. I tried to explain my experience to him and to several people but they all put it down to the anaesthetic.  How could I convince them that this had been no dream, that it was more real than anything else I had ever experienced.  I'd had dreams before, under normal circumstances and under anaesthetic, and this was totally different.  Eventually I tucked my memories of my wonderful experience away in my heart knowing that despite other people's disbelief, I was now convinced that I had proof that there was something more than this life, and I was also convinced that it had something to do with the God of the Bible, the God that my father had believed in.  I seemed to be experiencing glimpses of His supernatural power at different times in my life, and it was making me more and more aware of Him.  I did not understand why or how this had happened to me, but I knew that it had happened, and nobody on this earth could persuade me otherwise.


Some years later three separate incidents in my life were to strengthen this conviction.  I read that the actor, Peter Sellers had also had a 'near death experience' and he too was told that he had to come back as his time here was not finished, and  I came to live next door but one to a girl who had exactly the same experience as myself, also in a dental surgery, with the very same words spoken to her.  Seven years later I became born again of God's Holy Spirit, receiving the gift of tongues, a language I had never learnt, after being baptized in water and suddenly I felt a connection with my experience seven years previous.  Then I read two passages in the Bible.  One which spoke of a person experiencing a similar incident, also being told things that they were not permitted to speak about:-  ' I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago—whether in the body I do not know, or whether out of the body I do not know, God knows—such a one was caught up to the third heaven And I know such a man—whether in the body or out of the body I do not know, God knows—  how he was caught up into Paradise and heard inexpressible words, which it is not lawful for a man to utter.' (2 Corinthians ch. 12 vs. 2,3 and 4. } Here the place 'paradise' is also called the 'third heaven' a few verses down.

The other passage was  Jeremiah ch. 1 v. 5 , where God says to Jeremiah 'Before I formed you in the womb I knew you.'

These scriptures were the greatest comfort to me, and verified what had happened to me and where I had been taken to seven years previous. 

Second chance

 Once again I have felt led to repost something I wrote some years ago on my blog, to give all glory to God and His Son Jesus, and their presence in my life:-

The following is a song that I wrote after I had come to know Jesus as my Saviour, and was one of the songs I used to sing in the streets with a Christian friend.  I write this song on my blog as a testimony to the love and compassion that I have found in that Saviour.

Second chance

Listen all you people there's a story to be told
a wondrous tale of beauty talked about in days of old
It speaks about a mystery, a beautiful romance
how the God of all creation gave this world a second chance
A second chance to walk with God, to become His holy child
to be rescued from our wretchedness, and to Him be reconciled
by believing on Jesus, the lamb who was slain
that we might be accepted by the Father again
No more to be in torment, no more to be in shame
when we trust on our Saviour and the power in His name
Yes the Father sent Jesus just to save you and me
He's the bread sent from Heaven, He's the life-giving tree
So turn from your hard labour, come out from slavery
for the Son of God released you on that cross at Calvary
Don't let sin be your master, come shout sing and dance
for the Lord God of Heaven has given us a second chance

There are two other songs which I felt to put on this post.  The first one is a song in which I felt the Lord was speaking to me, and the second one is me speaking to God, in a prayer that I made, and still do make, for others.

Weep no more child

Lost in the world, I was entangled in sin and shame
Lord that was when I met You
Then from my grave I heard You calling, calling my name
with a voice that was gentle but true
'Turn around my child, and look at me'
were the words that were piercing my heart
'Turn around from your sin, be set free
come to me and make a new start'
Then water so pure and crystal clear
was washing away all my doubt and my fear
and the tears ran free, as you said to me......

'Weep no more child, I have bought your peace
I have suffered in your place
All the blows the world has dealt you
I have taken on my face
Turn around, turn around and I will forgive
Turn around, turn around, turn around child and live
For I take no pleasure in the death of a soul
Turn around, seek my face child, and I'll make you whole

Strive no more child, I can bring release
I regained what you had lost
Righteousness was purchased for you
when they nailed me to that cross
Turn around, turn around, and I will forgive
Turn around, turn around, turn around child and live
For I take no pleasure in the death of a soul
Turn around, seek my face child, and I'll make you whole

Sin no more child, turn and look at me
see that I have paid the price
So that you could have salvation
I became the sacrifice
Turn around, turn around and I will forgive
Turn around, turn around, turn around child and live
For I take no pleasure in the death of a soul
Turn around, seek my face child, and I'll make you whole

Somewhere

Somewhere someone's hurting Lord
somewhere someone's hurting
A wife has left her husband
and he's crying in despair
he doesn't know there's a comforter
he doesn't know You're there
Lord reach out and comfort him
send help from above
send help from the sanctuary
let the world see Your love

Somewhere someone's dying Lord
somewhere someone's dying
The doctors shake their heads and say
' There's nothing can be done '
but they've never seen a miracle
performed by God's own Son
Lord reach out and heal him
send help from above
send help from the sanctuary
let the world see Your love    

Somewhere someone's crying Lord
somewhere someone's crying
her tears are shed for all mankind
she knows the end is near
but she doesn't know there's a perfect love
that casts out every fear
Lord reach out and love her
send help from above
send help from the sanctuary
let the world see Your love

Somewhere someone's waiting Lord
somewhere someone's waiting
They've heard there's hope in Jesus Christ
the name above them all
so they're waiting for their Lord's return
responding to Your call
Lord, you've reached out to us
God sent help from above
He sent help from His sanctuary
when He sent You, His perfect love

In my thirty five years of knowing Jesus, I have come to know, and am still learning about, that perfect love of God  that wants to change us into the image of His Son, but understands that we are flesh.  I have never come across anything so compassionate, longsuffering and powerful.  That love has the ability to change me, not by force, but by placing in me the knowledge that the change would bring about the most beautiful peace in my soul that I could ever imagine.

Jesus went to the stable for me

 Jesus went to the stable for me
born in a human likeness was He
a babe in a manger He was to be 
just as the Father told Him
There He lay with the cattle and sheep
placed on a bed of straw to sleep
every word in His heart to keep
just as the Father told Him 
Jesus went to the desert for me
taunted and tempted by Satan was He
but Jesus answered words of victory
just as the Father told Him
‘You shall have everything you see’
Satan said ‘If you worship me’
‘To God alone will I bow’ said he
just as the Father told Him
Jesus went to the mountain for me
Spoke with Elijah and Moses did He
there He was given all authority
just as the Father told Him
‘We’ll build booths for these two’ they said
‘see they have come back from the dead’
‘My Son alone will you hear instead’
was just what the Father told them
Jesus came in the Spirit for me
Comforter, counsellor, healer is He
and from the curse I have been set free
just as the Father tells me
Now my heart and my mind are stirred
I must act on what I have heard
and I shall live by God’s every word
just as the Father tells me

The window of opportunity

 'Stay in bed for the day' my husband said' get rid of that cold'. 'Hmm.. I thought, maybe I will have a few hours in bed.'  I could do with a rest. So I had stayed in bed that morning and much of the afternoon.

As I was laying there, gazing out through the window, I watched the people passing by in the street and reflected on how their lives might be, on whether there might be sadness behind the smile, or worry and anxiety behind the sombre look.  I thought of how little we might know about one another's lives, whether we be workmates, neighbours or even strangers. After a while my husband brought me a cup of tea and I started to feel a little better, and decided to read.  I looked at the books on my shelves and chose a book of poems called 'In Memory Of', a collection of poets' tributes to, and memories of, friends and loved ones that had died.

As I read poem after poem of people's feelings, some of joyful memories and some of grief, I began to realize that God was revealing to me what I had pondered on earlier while gazing through my window.  He was now showing me what lay behind a face in the street, revealing to me people's innermost feelings, people who were mostly hurting through loss and loneliness.

I don't believe that God does anything by chance. I am a Christian and 'every day in my life is written in His book  before even one of them was formed.' 

As I lay in my bed I had to question my part in life as far as my fellow man was concerned.  I read on and became filled with compassion for the people who had allowed me to see into their lives. 

I know that on that day, when I was brought to see inside the hearts and minds of others, I felt compassion which brought in turn responsibility. I have been made aware of the loneliness and suffering of others, Christians included, and it has compelled me to play my part in life to the best of my ability.  May the Lord help me always to be alert to where, and when, I may help another.

One poem in particular about a man who was grief stricken at the loss of his soul mate and looked to God for release filled me with such sadness that it brought me to write this poem which contains, I suppose, my own deepest feelings.

THE WINDOW

'Twas sickness caused me on that day 

to rest and in my bed to lay

while through my window I could see 

the world outside did not need me

It carried on its busy life 

regardless of my pain and strife

Yet as I gazed upon the scene 

that lay beyond lace covered screen

I wondered at each passer by.... 

if face reflected truth or lie

I lay in comfort needing naught 

my husband food and drink had brought

but for my mind to idle be 

was nothing short of misery

Then suddenly my eye was cast 

upon my books - a treasure vast

A book of poems I should read 

to satisfy my spirit's need

To see what lay within the mind 

of other beings of my kind

I turned the pages one by one... 

a stirring journey had begun

For hidden there in every leaf 

was joy and sorrow, love and grief

A vast collection here was seen  

of frozen dreams that might have been

of past regrets and loneliness  

sweet memories of tenderness

lost loves and breaking of the heart 

when sudden death caused to depart

a soul mate of so many years

My burning cheeks felt cooling tears

Such moving stories I had read 

as I lay sick upon my bed

a window had been shown to me 

through which I 'd seen reality

of pain that lay behind a smile  

of need to go the extra mile

What of my part in life I thought 

What words of comfort had I brought

in all my years upon this Earth  

What words of love, support and worth

had touched the lives of those I'd met  

Was there remorse, was there regret?

What use is it if kindly word 

is left in thought and never heard?

This world that from my bed I saw, 

that looked so proud and strong before

has need of me.... and I of it, 

each soul to do its special bit

To share with others words of love  

God's seeds of blessing from above

is all that may be asked of me 

to help to set another free

from pain and hurt and misery 

that death and loss has caused to be

But seeds can never come to birth 

unless they're planted in the earth

So Father help me in my life 

to ease another person's life

to seek my Lord to try to do 

the things that I have learned from You

and may You cause my eyes to see 

windows of opportunity

to stretch a tender loving hand 

towards the suffering in this land,

to sow Your seeds of love and peace  

that word and deed might bring release 

How do we think

I feel to republish a post I wrote some time ago. 

I had a dream in which I was trying to speak to a very important person on the phone but could not get connected. This brought me to think of how we, as believers, connect with God. Do we connect with Him through the carnal mind or the mind of Christ as spoken of in 1 Corinthians ch. 2 v.16:- 

'For who has known the mind of the LORD, that he may instruct Him? But we have the MIND OF CHRIST.' This is saying that when we have been born again of the Holy Spirit and  are spiritually  part of the body of Christ on earth, as stated in 1 Corinthians vs. 12 and 13 ( For in one Spirit we were all baptised into one body, whether Jews, or Greeks , slave or free, and we were all given one Spirit to drink...) then we  have the mind of Christ. 

Isaiah ch. 55 vs. 8 and 9 clearly states that Gods thoughts and ways are totally different to mankind's thoughts and ways :- 'For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways' declares the LORD.
Do we argue with that Word?

Job ch. 40 v.2 states:-

' Shall he that contends with the Almighty instruct Him? he that reproves God, let him answer it.'

This is how Paul the Apostle spoke to believers in Ephesians ch. 4 vs 22-24 regarding how they should be in Christ:-

'You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires, to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.'

Jesus' Words to us, enlightened by the Holy Spirit,  are what enable us to work out our salvation, and just as He did, we too can learn obedience through the things we suffer, trials strengthening us as we journey on.  Hebrews ch. 5 vs. 8 and 9 state:- 'though He was a Son, yet He learned obedience by the things which He suffered. And having been perfected, He became the author of eternal salvation to all who obey Him,'  and I see through this that to 'obey' Him means to 'act' on the Word spoken to us as believers, and not just be 'hearers' of that Word.

Recently, the cover on my mobile phone broke and I needed to buy a new one. I do not buy on line and asked my daughter in law if she would order one for me. She went through several of them for me, asking which one I would like, many with butterflies on which I said would be the right one but which were out of stock.  She came to one with a picture of a lion on it and asked me would I like it. I said 'I love lions' , so she ordered it for me. She said 'What will you call the lion?' I started thinking about this and suddenly she said to me 'Did you say 'Judah'? I said to her that I had not said a word. She could not believe it, and said she literally had goose bumps on her arms.

Isaiah ch. 61 v.10 reads:-

I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For He has clothed me with garments of salvation and ARRAYED ME in a robe of HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS.' 

1 Corinthians ch. 1 v.30 reads:-

'It is because of Him that you are in Christ Jesus, Who has BECOME for us wisdom from God: our RIGHTEOUSNESS, holiness and redemption....'

If the scriptures say that He has become our righteousness, and also that God has arrayed me in a robe of righteousness, I believe absolutely that what happened with my daughter in law regarding my phone cover is a sign from the Lord accompanying His Word.

What I have on my mobile screen is a picture of a sea and the words 'Walk on water', signifying that I must keep my eyes focused on the Lord, and not on the tribulations in my life.  Now that there will be a lion covering on that statement it speaks Spiritually to me that as long as I keep my eyes upon the Lord, Who is the Word of God, then I shall be covered by His righteousness.

I end this post with a section of 2 Corinthians ch. 10 v.5  that has greatly encouraged me to change my way of thinking.

'.......bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ' 

 Every morning, before I start my day, I open my Bible to read the Word. This morning I read Psalm ch. 9, and these words really spoke to me. 

'But the Lord sits enthroned for ever, He has established His throne for judgement, and He judges the world with righteousness, He judges the people with equity. The Lord is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble, and those who know Thy name put their trust in Thee, for Thou, O Lord, hast not forsaken those who seek Thee. Sing praises to the Lord Who dwells in Zion! Tell among the peoples His deeds! For He Who avenges blood is mindful of them, He does not forget the cry of the afflicted.'  vs. 7-12

The following is a picture poem I wrote and painted a long time ago. I have probably shared this before, but it continues to speak to me daily.